I don't think I ever really appreciated rainstorms until I moved to the midwest. I realize as I write this that those of you in Utah are (and have been for quite a while) getting dumped on by rainstorm after rainstorm, but as cliche as it may sound rainstorms in the midwest are just different. Cooler ;). The drips, plops, and splatters create a symphony so beautiful to hear that it makes me sad when the wind blows and I have to shut my windows. Often times it excels to a great crescendo, that last for hours, of the heaven opening up and crying large tear drops down on us, as a bash of thunder and lighting drum in the background. It's beautiful. And just makes me think of how lucky and appreciative I am of things in my life. I have the best life.
We don't have much, and yet we have everything we need to make us happy and then some. I have found the enjoyment of making much of our own things. Its funny that when I was around those who could teach me to sew and bottle and scrapbook, I never wanted to do it. When I moved many miles away suddenly that appeals to me. I now am slowly learning to craft, and finding the joy that creating something can bring.
We do without some of the things that we had before. We rarely go out to eat, and when we do its a special occasion. I remember my Grandma telling me of how when her Dad took them to get a hamburger it was a big deal; a very special occasion. That's what it is turning into for my kids. I love it. We are finding joy in the simple things, and really I think it makes my kids happier and more pleasant people.
Liam has the innate want to do good. He has so much respect for Tony and I, I love it. Especially for me. He will do anything that I ask him and do it happily. He loves his brother and sister and is the perfect big brother. He usually shares, and will help we watch and play with his siblings. He is tender-hearted and is torn apart if he ever gets in trouble, especially if it is his Dad who is disciplining. He hates to upset or disappoint us, and tries his best not to.
Emma is still my Luna Lovegood. I have loved moving out here and have people get to know her and say things like, "she's different." Not in a "oh dear, she's different" type of a way but a "that's awesome that she's different" way. The way she speaks and tells things is just different. I believe she thinks different than most of us. I hope she never changes, because when things go wrong in the world or lives, sometimes what you need is something different. She's the sweetest and most sassy little sunspot you ever did meet.
Fox is just fun loving. He wants everything to be a game. He loves to walk up to the kids sitting on the ground and teasingly lay against them, while saying "aaahhhh". He loves to be tickled and chased after. He follows his siblings around and is one of them. There is very little that they can do that he doesn't at least think he can do. He has grown to be fearless. He will jump/step of off high places into the arms of me and Tony. He will jump/step off of our couch and face plant it on the floor, laugh, and then stand up and do it again. Really, sometimes I don't know what I am going to do with him.
Tony and I are doing great. I believe that this move has been the best thing for our marriage. We were never in a bad spot before, but now we rely on each other more, we know each other better, and I really feel like we love each other more deeply. I am enchanted by him (sorry for the mushy stuff :)).
I am doing fantastic. I love feeling strong, and like my body is finally (after 5 years) getting back to it's normal self. I'm excited, and nervous (as always) for what lies ahead.
Believe me, my life doesn't always seem this great. There are times when I cry and worry, when I'm furious and just want the day to end. But today it must be the magic of the rainstorm showing me what I have to be grateful for.
Here's me overflowing with joy. Ahh, I finally own a car that's mine to drive again. All my dreams are complete ;).
Yippie! Perhaps I'll have to share the story on what it took to get this van sometime, but not tonight. Happy night, every one (and a happy birthday to my buddy, Daniel), may all your swagger wagon dreams come true.
