Nothing to write about

I really don't have anything real important to write about. So be warned this post will probably have no point. eh, oh well.

Ever have those days (months in my case) where you feeling like you are just floating through life, not really making any significant contributions to anything? That's the way I've felt the last couple of weeks. I know that I'm doing stuff, but I feel like I'm not really getting anywhere, or moving forward. And I'm working on all sorts of things; spiritually, mentally, physically, but they are so minute (a lot of detail work, and not big stuff), that I feel like I'm stuck. A lot of what I'm working on I have to deal with to move forward, but it's still an unsettling feeling for me.

Fox has a new go-to word. It use to be "eat" or "outside". For example, he will say my name over and over again until I finally answer him, and sometimes when I finally answer him he would have forgotten what he really wanted to say and would answer "eat" or "outside", his go-to words. He's new go to word--"taco".

I don't know what it is with my toddlers and tacos. When Liam was 2 or 3 he use to have an imaginary cat that he could "hold in my hands" that was named Tacohead. Tacohead stayed with us for a couple of months, and still occasionally gets brought up in conversations.

And now Fox's new word is taco. He inserts it anywhere that he doesn't know a word. He often has full conversations with me, where the only word I pick up on is taco. He also will repeatedly say my name until I say "what Fox?" Then he'll reply "taco". I don't really know what taco means to him, but you have to admit, it's a pretty fun word to say.

I have a fear of being judged. Really. I do. I fear that people will judge me before they figure out how flippin' awesome I really am, and then they'll never get a chance to... I can't tell you how many people I've judged (I've really got to stop doing that) and then fate brought us together and I found out just how far off my judgment was. I've decided (just barely as I type this) that I should start dress and accessorizing so outlandishly that people wont know how to judge me, and then they'll have to get to know me! Awesome! ...or I should just stop judging other people, and then maybe I won't care anymore if they judge me. 'Cause I'm fantastic...just sayin'.

It's only two weeks until Tony and Fox's birthday. I really wanted to do a sushi party until Tony reminded me that I don't know how to make sushi. No, really I do, but Tony is the main su-shay (that's how you say it when your hip) maker in this house, and he really didn't want to make a bizzillion things of sushi for his own birthday party. Dang. And it was going to be so cute, with candy sushi and everything. Now I have to think of a new birthday party idea. Because just a plain party will never do...

I'm kind of afraid to be my real self, because I'm pretty sure that the conversations/thoughts that I have go on in my head would frighten most people...except those suffering from schizophrenia, Alzheimer's, or people from Jersey.

I'm horrible at keeping fish alive. You think it would be easy, water and food, right? (And never leave your fish infront of a fireplace...poor, poor Spanky) Remember our two fish that we got for Easter? One fish, Hey-suess, decide to commit fishercide and some how managed to jump out of his fishy haven (remember the part where fish need water?). He was found as fish-jerky the next morning. Our other fish, Optimus Prime, is still living!.. but has developed an incurable disease called "dropsy". Optimus Prime now has a gianormous belly because his kidneys are failing and all the food he eats just stays in there (Yeah, the other part, food, not so good at.). So now I just wait for him to die, and pray that he goes belly up before his belly explodes. (Gruesome, but 100% true. I'd much rather find a dead fish than an exploded one)

Ah, I should probably end this post on something more uplifting...but I can't think of anything, so that's it...sorry so spastic and random....

Emma the ballerina

Emma started ballet yesterday. And lets admit it, She's one cute ballerina. Even when doing her ballet pose. :) I adore the pink and skirt and tights and shoes and bun, seriously darling :)

Fox the Pirate

These are from when Bryan and Leah where at our house. Awesome. :) It's a bionicle container...you know, the things lego "bionicle"'s come in?

Dirt biking 101

So I should be downstairs cleaning my stinking house (literally stinking, darn broccoli soup), and doing laundry, and writing out a shopping list, buuut-I'm not. Because updating my blog it much more important...and a whole lot less...cleaning-y.

One of the deals when we went to Utah was that Tony would agree to go, as long as he got to see Bryan (ridiculous, I know). Bryan lives in northern California, so we toyed around with ideas of driving to Utah and flying Tony to Cali. And then Bryan informed us that he was going to Utah the first part of August. Tony hoped on board, and I got an extra 2-ish weeks that I got to stay in Utah (YAHOO!!). When Bryan came out he brought his dirt bikes, which Tony and Bryan rode every day they were together, and which they wanted me to try.

So here I am, looking adorably attractive in my dirt bike get up.

I rode the bike for about 15 minutes, lost control many times, crashed once, then got frustrated, cried, and made Stevie ride the bike the rest of the time while I rode on the four wheeler with Sierra :). (Just for clarification ((and to boost my ego)) I did go out with Tony and Bryan one other time, practiced, and learned to ride like a pro...ahem.)

Even though I gave up on the bike...and cried...we still had an awesome time. Here's Tony and Bryan's tough, manly shadows.
The boys got a wee bit frustrated with us girls...I don't know why...

Did you hear Bryan say "Five minutes? More like 15"?! What a punk ;)

We were a bit faster on the way down...I basically am going to enter into the next four wheeler race I come across.

Iowa City

Yesterday (Labor day) we decided to head to Iowa city to check it out. It was a beautiful day, the sky was so blue with puffy, white clouds that I wondered went we would run into the wall they were painted on :).

We also stopped at the "World's Largest Truckstop" (or so they claim). It's only about 5-10 minutes outside of Davenport. I know you are all jealous. :)
We saw the Hawkeye stadium, once again I know your jealous. I was told before I came out here by a native Iowan that the only phrase I had to learn to fit it was, "Go Hawkeyes!!" He was so right. Although I have yet to buy my yellow and black jersey shirt...I still get weird looks when I go to the grocery store, on game days, without it. Needless to say, it is on my Christmas list.
When we arrived in Iowa city we were starving, so we stopped at a BBQ joint called Bandana's. It was "eh"... Texas road house beats it out, but at least we all looked cute, right?




Afterwords we went to a super cool outdoor shopping area that had tons of shops, a huge playground, and fountain.







All in all it was a successful, fun trip to somewhere we've never been before. Hooray!

Last Good Advice

There's one more piece of good advice that my Mom gave me. - Throw out the drama. Growing up I always had a hard time understanding exactly why she would tell us to not get involved in drama, because, lets face it, drama is what high school is all about. It's "fun". My mom would make us change the radio station if "Mama's shoes" ever came on during Christmas, because she would say that the world had enough drama, why add more. It always made me giggle. But as I've grown I've seen exactly what she is talking about.

A few months ago I called my mom and asked "Are there really that many crazy people in the world?" With in a few weeks I had been bombarded by people who were letting drama rule their life and making more unnecessary drama on top of that. It floored me. And I knew...I know I don't want any of that in my life. Mom was right.

This past week a brilliant person "graduated", as her obituary read, from this world. And I'm not going to lie, I hid from it. I hid from the fact that she moved on, I hid from my emotions, and I pushed them all as far away as I could. But eventually life, real life, catches up to you.

Lindsey was a beautiful person. She lived a large part of her life battling brain tumors, but she was always happy and optimistic. She always was cheerful and making me laugh. She was a light in a world that gets continually darker. She is beautiful. No wonder the Lord took her home, he must have so much work for her to do.

No, I don't need any more drama, I have enough. This life moves too fast to waste on unnecessary drama.

And so to Mrs. Lindsey Kae Robinson Karr- I can't believe your face book page! Page after page of people celebrating you! None of them are down trodden or upset, but are giving glory to the wonderful life you lived! You were such an example, Lindsey, of what life should really be; love, joy, hope, happiness. Good luck on the other side (like you'll really need it ;) ). 'til we meet again. And Lindsey, Thanks.

Good Advice

I've been think a lot lately about some of the good advice I've gotten that has stuck with me. All have had a different impact on me, my family, and life, and have been proven true through mistakes that I have made. So, like a bad bridal shower game, here is some of my good advice.

1. Never go to bed angry at one another-(heard first from my mom and then at every bridal shower ever known in the history of time)

This one is mostly for women. i.e. One night Tony and I had an argument, okay, lets admit it, a fight. Both of us thought we were right and were unwilling to budge on our thoughts and feelings. We both got in bed, where I fumed for a few minutes and then furiously got up a went down to do the unfinished dirty dishes. I angrily did the dishes and slammed cupboard expecting Tony to come down and apologize or at least hash it out with me. He never did.

A while later I headed back up stairs, not wanting to be the one to sleep on the couch, and slept perched uncomfortably on the edge of the bed as to not touch my culprit husband. After a horrible nights sleep I gave Tony the silent/two word treatment and sent him off to work. I was furious. That night it did get hashed out, and we agreed to disagree but understand one another. Later, once again happy with one another, I asked with puppy love eyes if he too had had a horrible night as I had. He replied, "I was angry at first, but then I heard you banging the cupboards downstairs and thought 'that is so cute,' got over it and fell asleep."

Yep. It's advice for women so that we wont stay awake all night fuming while they quickly get over it and sleep peacefully. You know how boys can fight and punch each other and then be over it, but when girls fight they tear each other down for days? Same concept.

2. Tell your children how you want them to be, and they'll become it- (Grammy Pugh)

For example-We all talk in front of our children about our children. We talk to others, ourselves or our children about them and their actions. Grammy taught me to tell the kids what you want them to be. If you want them to be snots then tell them that they are snots. If you want them to be shy then tell them that they are shy. If you want them to be kind, then tell them they are kind. It works. I try to tell my kids and others that my kids are awesome, kind and loving, and for the most part they are. It's also worked the other way. I've told others that Emma is mischievous, and she is, and since I've said it a couple of times its escalated. I've really got to do some damage control on that one.

3. It wont be easier in the morning-(found online)

Dishes. Really, need I say more?

Another one that goes along with this is -Save money by always doing your dishes after you eat. That way, when it's time to make a meal again you don't feel overwhelmed by the towering dirty dish pile and decide to go out to eat instead-(Jen Fugal)

4. Always assume good intention-

This one and the next one I got while snooping around Tony's best friends parents house. These people are my heroes. If I could be a mix between them and my parents (with a few other friends and family members qualities thrown in) I think I would be my perfect person. That's how I justify snooping around their house (Okay, I don't really snoop I just keep my eyes open). They have some of their goals and goal qualities posted up in their house and this was one of them. I love it. I just hope they really mean it, because after I snooped and saw this, I borrowed some clothes to go dirt bike riding in and got them all dirty. Wanting to be grateful for letting me borrow the clothes I took them home and washed them...and then forgot to give them back...and then left Utah. Luckily, I did manage to give them to my MIL who's friends with the Tuttle's and lives close by. I can only hope they really got to them.

5. Become debt and financial free so that you can freely give to others-

Clearly this is still a goal of mine. But one day, sooner than later I will do it. In the mean time I'll still try to give what I can.

Words to live by. Any advice you've gotten that's stuck, that I can add to my "stuck-good-advice" pile?